Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Don't call it a comeback.....

I have resorted to the ultimate washed up lifestyle.

I wear a grey champion hoody with a ripped pocket.
I wear navy plue sweatpants with tapered ankles.
I havent been to the barbershop in 2 months.
I eat whole weat pancakes for breakfast and dinner.
I have salsa sandwiches for lunch.
I spend my free time watching Lifetime or TLC.
My room smells like full court basketball.

Thursday, January 22, 2009

a night in the life of a washed up nigga...

So after said nigga got done work.....said nigga proceeded to drive to the gas station with tank on "E" and only got $11 worth of gas because regardless of the fact that said nigga's president is black....he is still broke....

After the trip to the gas station said nigga went home and was bored and visited the website for the washed up aka "dating on demand".

After watching 2 episodes of cheaters.....said nigga went out to a bar surrounded by the whitest of white folks.....paranoid as a motherfucker. Said nigga then came home and fell asleep on the couch watching CNN.

All in all a great night of being washed the fuck up!

Random Washed Up Moment 1.22.09

I'm at the the barbershop......old african man is in here reciting public enemy songs at the top of his lungs...smh

Monday, January 19, 2009

Random Washed up moment 1.19.09

Was just in Walmart..where all the washed up people go. Not only did I get bread, peanut butter, and jelly...but...the bread was whole grain...

Smh....

Friday, January 16, 2009

"Washed up" Weekend plans......Pt.1



This weekend its going to be plenty of Inauguration parties. Props to all bars that will be serving drinks called "Obama" and shots called "Barack". What about the washed up folks? Well here's some washed up activities for the people rocking house shoes and pajamas from Friday evening to Monday morning.....

Fuck it. Nothing burns time like playing poker on xbox live and talking to people from Boise. Turn on the Xbox at about 7pm tonight and it should carry u to the next morning easy.

Watch a BET movie. If watching "Fresh" or "Tales from the hood" doesn't put u to sleep quick than i don't know what can.

Go to ya local bar. Not the spot that's popping. Go to the bar all the washed up people go to. So what u got on a hoody & tims and most the people in there got on hunting gear. So what most of these people look like McCain supporters. Go in there, order a beer, drink it, then go back home asap.


Your welcome.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

DMX.....washed up artist of the week

This nigga went from this....
to this......ended up looking like this.....and now his new 'fame is a hellllllllllll of a drug' makeover.....He is rapping while talking and wearing a pink thermal!

Washed Up Reviews for the day 01/14

Washed Up Fuckery props to Nerd At the Cool Table
I-Phone, Blackberry >>>> Sidekick
Once a 17 yr old girl told me my phone was cute….i decided I needed to upgrade.
Don’t ask why I was engaged in a conversation with a 17 yr old…"what exactly do you mean by teenager?"…SMH

Blackberry Messenger, Twitter>>>>AIM
I rarely use AIM anymore…I hear this blackberry messenger shit is crack from the 80’s! and Twitter is some next level other shit!

Facebook>>>> Myspace
If you are a lurking ass dude Facebook is your parked car. Myspace is washed up…...read this post word to Niketalk...pure comedy, but for real this is a washed up version of online dating hahaha.

Email Arguments>>>>Text Message Arguments
Any time your text message ends up in 2 messages…...send an email. Real Talk. This does not mean that you will get the asnwers you want but at least that way you wont look like a mad man Turbo Texting with aggression.

Ipod/Zune>>>>CD’s of any kind
Nobody is buying CD’s anymore….Unless artists pose naked on their album covers….niggas aint buyin shit. But word to the porn bailout that probably wont even work. And yes I am listening to Jordin Sparks.....What did you expect??? Nigga i'm washed up.

Digital Singles>>>>Albums
Please tell me the last CD that had more than 5 singles….College Dropout and Get Rich or Die Tryin….

Torrents >>>>Limewire
If I even gotta explain what a torrent is….you gotta step your internet thievery game up.

Orbit >>>>5 Gum
Strawberry Mint, Maui Melon Mint crushes 5 Gum…nevermind…this gum just lost its flavor and my breath smells like sour milk. Fuck Orbit and 5 Gum! I pledge allegiance to Trident

Monday, January 12, 2009

Welcome to the Official Washed the Fuck up Blog!

Word to all things washed up, out of touch with reality and clinging on for dear life. Music, Niggas, Bidges, Bidge azz Niggas, News and Non-sense!
Being Washed Up:
A person who upon initial glance causes you to have this reaction...myspace layouts images

A woman who still thinks her milkshake brings all the boys to the yard....
An artist who is still trying to re-create a hit they had 2 summers ago....

Anything that makes no damn sense and lacks proper criminal skills or home training....
Anything that falls into the category as something your uncle with 12 silver chains would do....


Welcome to Washed the Fuck Up!
Washed up Pimps....Bishop Don Juan for looking like a leprechaun.
Check out this nigga hanging a green Motorola Razor from his neck...SMH


and this broke Katt Williams impersonator with the Squirrel Fur Coat and Sweated out Perm...